


My Favorite Things

by elemenopee



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: J/B Shuffled Challenge, Kid Fic, Post-Canon, The fluffiest fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-21
Updated: 2013-11-21
Packaged: 2018-01-02 05:06:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1052853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elemenopee/pseuds/elemenopee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My first fic and it's for the shuffled challened. Song - "My Favorite Things" from The Sound of Music.<br/>I mean... seriously, I could not pass that up. The perfect excuse to write fluff.<br/>Summary? I pretty much just took the scene and put it in Westeros.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Favorite Things

**Author's Note:**

> BTW, I'm a good reader, but I'm absolutely terrible at writing. It's intimidating to post on here because everyone is like freakin Shakespeare, but I couldn't help but write this. Thank you so much Currawong for being an awesome beta!

The door swung open, crashing loudly against the wall. A little figure stood in the doorway, a wisp of golden hair visible by the flickering candle, her tiny fingers grasping the candlestick as an anchor for her safety.

“Catelyn, why are you here?”  The girl said nothing as she stepped further into the room, head hung low. The clouds parted enough to let moonlight leak through the window, exposing her daughter’s tear stained cheeks.

“Come here,” Brienne pulled back the furs, inviting her daughter in, happy for the company. In her youth, Brienne never thought she’d know the warmth of a man beside her at nights; she’d especially never dreamed that she’d become so adjusted to another’s warmth that sleep would not come easily while alone. She had spent more nights beside Jaime than she had not, and his absence from their marriage bed triggered restless nights.

Catelyn placed the candle on the floor and shuffled slowly towards the bed, keeping her head low; her long night gown dragged lightly across the stone.

 _CRASH!_ Thunder shook the walls as lightning illuminated the room, temporarily blinding Brienne. The storm was directly above them, and her daughter had leapt quickly into her bed, burrowing her head into her mother’s stomach. Brienne placed a hand over her daughter’s knotted mane. With reactions that quick, Catelyn should be destined to wield a sword, though the thought of her little ones playing with death caused her stomach to churn. Thankfully, days of war had been few ever since the dragon Queen took the throne and the Others had been kept at bay. Spring soon followed. It had been a long spring, longer than a decade, though summer was on the horizon, a clue by the warm thunderstorms covering the Stormlands.

Before Brienne had a chance to soothe her youngest, three more figures burst into the room, fighting their way to the bed.

Brienne grunted as elbows knocked her head, daughters pushing and shoving their way under the furs. “There is room for us all, calm yourselves.” The three girls settled around her; Alys and Ema on her left, tall and lanky Mara on her right, and little Catelyn on top, burying her head into Brienne’s neck as if her mother’s embrace could defeat any storm. At ages seven, nine, and one and ten, Brienne had never dared to jump into her father’s bed for comfort, though if she had a mother, maybe nighttime fears would have been expressed more freely… nonetheless, their fear was entirely absurd. Brienne of Tarth and Jaime Lannister, two people who had to courageously face unimaginable horrors, would not create timid children.

“Why is it so loud?” Alys asked, shivering against Brienne’s left arm.

“The Gods must be angry,” Ema reasoned.

“Or, the Gods are happy, and they’ve decided to deliver summer. Do you imagine other children are seeking their mother’s comfort? You must be brave, not weak.”

 _CRASH!_ The girls screamed, flinching into Brienne as the sound rattled the windows.

“Like the woman in the song about the bear. She was brave,” Mara said, as if there had been no interruption. A sly grin pulled up the corner of her mouth and Brienne’s eyes bore into hers as a dangerous warning.

“The Bear and the Maiden Fair?” Alys asked Mara with excitement.

“No, the other one.”

 _CRASH!_ The girls’ screams were followed by an irritable shush from Brienne. The screaming was becoming more unbearable than the thunder.

“The one with lion horse!” Catelyn shouted. Brienne roughly pulled back the furs, not knowing whether to laugh or scold. How did those young, innocent ears get exposed to such a vile song?

 “That’s _lion’s whore,_ you fool.”

“Mara! She’s only _three_ ,” Brienne’s blonde brows furrowed.

 “That song is about you and father, isn’t it? Our House sigil is a lion and you…” Ema’s eyes slowly traveled along the horrid scar in place of what was once her cheek.

_Even my children find me repulsive._

As Ema began putting the pieces together, blood quickly rushed to Brienne cheeks.

It didn’t take long for small folk to create a song based off of the freakish maiden and handsome lion once the “Kingslayer’s whore” rumor spread throughout Westeros like wildfire. The idea of the most disgraced man in Westeros, who was infamous for killing his king and bedding his twin sister, taking the maidenhead of a highborn maid (who played as an honorable knight and had a face that could make milk curdle) was much entertainment for the men in the realm. Though the song did highlight their many journeys, from the bear pit to the defeat of the white walkers, its focus was on an inappropriate and vulgar embrace as the lion ripped through the ugly maiden’s armor with one sharp paw and besmirched her honor.

“It’s just a myth-“

A low groan from the sky rolled slowly above them _._ Brienne’s features puckered in anticipation for screams that did not come. Instead, the girls trembled beside her, ready to scream at the next sudden crash.  

“How do you keep brave, mother?” shy little Alys asked, her blue eyes peering over Brienne’s freckled arm.

 “I imagine things that bring me comfort when fear finds me. So during the next storm, think of happy things, because your father will have returned by then and you’d be a fool to think he’d allow this.” _For reasons you do not need to know,_ she continued to flush, thankful for the darkness concealing the pink shade. How was he able to make blood fill her cheeks when he was not even present?

It had been a few moon turns since she had last seen him, the longest they had been apart in years. The feeling of his soft lips against hers still lingered, as did his musky scent on the pillows.

 “What do you think of?” Ema’s green eyes locked onto Brienne’s.

 _Jaime_ , warmth rushed through her at the thought. All the times he had kept her alive and strong without his knowing: during her journey to find the Stark girls, fighting the white walkers in the North, battling fevers from infected wounds, championing him against Barristan Selmy, and every time she met the birthing bed – the most frightening battle of all. But before Ser Jaime had stumbled into her life, something else consumed her thoughts during times of fear. “I like to think of Tarth. The smell of the sea, the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks, the tall, prickly weeds beneath my fingertips, the beautiful mixtures of colors of blues and greens…”

Catelyn removed her thumb from her mouth with a pop, “goats!”

Brienne smiled warmly, “If they make you happy then yes, goats will work.” Catelyn nestled her head into the crook of Brienne’s neck, resuming her peaceful thumb sucking. The remaining three girls began adding to the list.

“Kittens!”

“A good book.”

“Sword fighting!”

“Riding.”

“A new dress!”

 _CRASH!_ The girls ducked their heads, letting out tiny squeaks.

 The flash revealed two figures stepping through the door frame. “They’re in here,” Galladon closed the door behind him as the two entered the room. “As the future Lord of Tarth, I felt it my duty to check on my little sisters, wondering if you had been wakened or frightened, but we bumped into a handmaid in the corridor who pointed us in this direction.”

“And... Elric’s reason?” Mara eyed her twin curiously.

“Why are you looking at _me_? You take me for a little girl? I’m to be a squire soon.” The boy of age one and ten straightened his posture, puffing out his chest in a manly fashion. The two seemed to loathe each other and possess no similarities, to Brienne’s secret relief, but that did not deter Jaime from keeping an extra close eye specifically on the two of them within the castle walls.

Another figure, tall and slender, tip toed into the room. Her long, golden blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders in waves; her bare feet exposed beneath the nightgown she had outgrown. Joanna, a girl of six and ten, walked slowly into the room.

“I went to check on everyone…” Joanna stood in the middle of the room, her arms dangling by her side as she shifted uncomfortably.

Joanna and Galladon had been her only children born during the harsh winter, and they were the only two children they had planned on raising, satisfied with both a son and daughter. However, the Gods felt Brienne was more a mother than she had thought, blessing her with more babes than she could handle, something she had thought would never be possible, or appropriate, given her previous life path. After seven years of ice and death, a long and mild spring was born, along with five unplanned babes to live within the castle walls of Tarth. The twins, Mara and Elric, came two years after Galladon during the first fortnight of Spring, followed by Alys two years later, then Ema. Catelyn was a special surprise, four years after Ema, for she and Jaime had done everything in their power to not conceive, already buried deep in loud and bickering children.

Her first born was blessed mostly by her father’s Lannister looks, and Brienne could not have been more relieved. Fortunately, the children were a perfect balance between the most hideous woman in Westeros and the man that looked half a God, creating average appearances. She would not wish her children to be beautiful, just as she would not wish them to be ugly, for both produced far greater challenges than those born simply average in a world filled with harmful men. However, Joanna, out of all of them, appeared mostly Lannister.

If it wasn’t for her unusual height and awkward posture, Brienne would think it was Cersei Lannister standing before her. Brienne knew that Cersei staring back at Jaime from the life he created with _Brienne,_ bothered him quite a bit, though she insisted that it was _him_ he was seeing, not his twin. It was _his_ golden locks, _his_ perfectly sculpted jaw line in a feminine form, _his_ perfect nose. But those eyes, those were all Brienne. It was Brienne staring back at him when he took a moment to look into his daughter’s blue hues. She could almost see the tension leaving his shoulders when he looked into Joanna’s eyes.

 _CRASH!_ The sudden, violent sound caused the girls to scream once again and Joanna joined the group at the foot of the bed.

“Quiet! Your screams are worse than the actual storm!” Galladon shouted with a pained expression, covering his ears with both of his hands. 

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Alys gave him a look, ready to push him out of the bed and onto the floor.

Elric and Mara began bickering her right, to her left Alys and Ema were shoving Galladon, Joanna was trying to pry the girls off of her brother, and Catelyn began to cry into Brienne’s neck.

“Stop!” Brienne shouted, causing Catelyn to choke back tears. Everyone froze in their spots. “You should all be grateful I’m even allowing you in here, especially given the hour.” Catelyn let out a muffled cry and Brienne shut her eyes tightly, letting a heavy sigh pass over her lips. “Now, where were we?”

“Favorite things that make us happy and brave!”

“I bet Elric thinks of honeyed chicken and lemon cakes,” Mara said, poking the fat of his belly with a look of disgust. He responded with a nasty glare, his warm blue eyes turning to ice. Elric was rotund for his age, but it appeared to be a child’s fat, for he had not yet grown to the height of his brother.

“I bet you think of Eddard Clegane, Joanna.” Galladon teased, lightly tapping Joanna’s arm with his elbow.

“I do not!” Joanna flushed a wild shade of pink, a misfortune inherited from her mother. “I bet you think of that serving wench I caught you-“

“What in the seven hells is this?” A familiar voice was heard. Each head lifted and turned towards the doorway. A figure stood, illuminated by a candle’s flame.  

“Father!” they cried, jumping out of bed hurriedly. They enveloped him in hugs, his clothes soaked to the skin. Though his hair had grown grey, it looked a muddy brown as it stuck to his face. Water dripped from the knotted strands, running off the tip of his nose and down his cheeks.

The thunder was now heard as a low rumble, heading towards the mainland to claim the next victims; the poor sleepless mothers.

 “Why have you returned early?” Brienne asked, slipping out of bed, making her way towards her husband. Her tone was more demanding than she had intended, for her heart skipped a beat at the sight of him. The clouds seemed to break and move on, the moon’s glow now reflecting brilliantly off the stone floor and walls.

“I’ve missed you too, wench.” A brow lifted and a half grin pulled at his mouth.

“We say favit things!” Catelyn said with enthusiasm, her soft curls dancing as she bounced up and down.    

He scooped her up with his left arm, resting her on his hip. “Favorite things? And why is that?”

“They were frightened by the flashes and thunder, so I was trying to distract them.”

“Frightened!” Jaime mocked, “What happened to my little cubs that play at swords and jump off cliffs into raging seas while my back is turned?”

“ _I_ wasn’t frightened!”

“Neither was I! We just came to check on them,” The boys spoke, quick to defend their presence.

“That’s very gallant of you two, but the storm has passed and everyone is safe, so off to sleep for all of you.”

“Share your favorite thing first!” Ema tugged at his trousers.

“Alright, let’s see…” His features scrunched dramatically as he pretended to ponder, “you, and only you, none of your brothers or sisters and _especially_ not your mother.” Brienne rolled her eyes, some of the children moaned as the others giggled. “Now, off you go!” He placed a kiss on Catelyn’s forehead before setting her down and shooed the rest out the door.

“What did they say?” Joanna whispered eagerly as she made her exit.

“We’ll talk soon,” he whispered back, closing the door behind her, sending her off with a reassuring smile. He turned to face Brienne, grinning playfully.

“I wasn’t expecting you for at least another fortnight. What happened?”

“I overestimated the need of my stay. I almost drowned out there in your retched Tarth waters, but luckily your men are experts at navigating the seas.” He placed his good hand on his wife cheek, gently pushing his lips against hers, tasting of salty sea and rain. He pulled away, only to lightly brush his lips along the length of her ruined cheek.

“ _Our_ men, Jaime,” she breathed, closing her eyes as she relished in the feel of his cracked, wind burned lips; contrasting wonderfully against the soft skin of her scar.

His lips twitched into a grin against her skin. “After becoming friendly with my left hand for such an excruciatingly long length of time, I was ready to walk in here and tear off every last shred of clothing you dared to cover yourself with, hard and wanting before I had even reached this damn island. I imagine your hand has grown just as tired as mine,” he growled low, his lips now resting on her ear. “So you can imagine the disappointment when I walked in to find my wench buried beneath children, a reminder as to why we should not be fucking. My cock has never gone limp that quickly.” 

_Over a decade of marriage and I still react like a blushing maid._

“So, if you overestimated the need of your stay,” Brienne tried to pull him on course, her cheeks flushed, “did they accept?” His lips stretched into a grin against her neck. He pulled away and began to discard his wet clothing. She got back into bed, keeping her eyes on him, anticipating the tale.

 “There was hesitancy as they considered playing grandparents to a babe of Lannister blood, _my_ blood as if the arrangement wasn’t unappealing enough, but after their persistent son threatened to scurry off to Tarth, they had no choice.” Jaime slid beneath the furs beside her, naked as his name day. Shivers ran down her spine as his cold, damp skin made contact with hers. “Joanna will be living her life in that frigid wasteland. Why are you still clothed?” He rolled atop her, distracted, pulling the gown from the neck to expose her shoulder. She had favored gowns as of late, for clothing didn’t last long on her body while she lay in bed with Jaime. _This is why we have so many children._

“She’ll be happy at the news, and I think she’ll flourish in the North. She has been asking for years,” Brienne said, attempting to keep him on the topic. Jaime’s hand slowly snaked up her gown, his fingertips lightly tracing circles up her thigh. She closed her eyes in an attempt to stay focused.

“I suppose I will just have to think of my _favit_ things when the time comes. Such as the freckles that dot your skin,” his lips brushed down her neck, hovering over each and every freckle as his mouth traced its journey. The limp cock didn’t last for very long; it was hard and ready, pushing against her leg.  She threw her head back into the pillow, squeezing her eyes shut, his fingers hovering over the juncture between her thighs. “The way you squirm beneath my touch,” his fingers dipped into her. A breathy moan escaped her lips as she arched her hips to meet his hand. “The many tales of valor forever etched into your skin,” his mouth traced along her scarred cheek, his dry lips against the soft skin, sending chills down her arms. “Your haunting, sapphire blue eyes,” He softly kissed her eyelids before lightly dragging his lips across her forehead.  Kisses were placed along her jaw, stopping at her eager mouth, a breath apart. “My name passing your lips,” he said, his voice low and breath hot.

“Jaime,” she whispered, a soft grin twitching at the corner her mouth. He kissed her hard and Brienne succumbed to the distraction, ready to be exhausted into a deep slumber.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't think Jaime and Brienne would ever have seven children lol, but someone on tumblr once said they wanted these two to have a ton of kids, and it fits with the scene this song is from, so WHY NOT? It was fun to play around with. Also, I don't like it when kids are always named after people, but it's hard to pick seven unique names and this was not meant to be serious and I'm a lazy SOB so... that was the reasoning behind the names. 
> 
> Basically, this fic is pretty ridiculous and it's not meant to be taken seriously and it's terrible but its purpose is to put a smile on someone's face. If I manage to make just one person smile then I'm satisfied! :)


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